A Soup of Conspiracies

Total Control of the Food Supply Soup

4 Trillion dollars in Corporate Bailouts
100 billion genetically modified seeds
600 million dead bees
Plastic sprinkles to taste

Use the 4 trillion to bail out GM, Chrysler, GE, AIG, Goldman Sachs, etc., so there won't be enough money left over to actually pump into the actual economy to actually make an actual difference in peoples lives.

Genetically modify every food crop so that farmers have to go back to Monsanto every year to buy new seeds, and make the seeds too expensive for anyone but huge agribusinesses to purchase, thus limiting the ability of the individual to grow food for himself.

Lastly, mix generously with Colony Collapse Disorder and refuse to fund any serious scientific investigation of the disappearance of millions of honey bees. Without bees to pollinate the heirloom vegetables, plants and trees, individuals won't be able to grow their own food at all, even if they have been careful husbands of the earth.

Sprinkle liberally with deadly plastic confetti and serve to everyone whether they like it or not. They will have no choice but to eat it, and pay you for the privelege.